Other-Worth or Self-Worth

"Self-worth cannot be verified by others. You are worthy because you say it is so. If you depend on others for your value it is other-worth."

- Dr Wayne W. Dyer

I was reading through some of my emails from The Daily Love by Mastin Kipp and I came across this quote above by Dr. Wayne W. Dyer, I remember seeing him on a PBS special a couple of years ago... I was so taken with the program that I had to go out and buy his book. There are so many common sense items in it, things that we know but sometimes we turn them around to sound better but we change the meaning, he states the meaning clearly...

This quote touched me as I have had a few self doubts about myself lately and I kept looking for someone or something to take away the doubts I have been having.... when really it is all up to me, if I say I am worthy, I am.  This seems like such an easy concept when you hear it but for me it's difficult because I have to accept that I can do something about the way I feel.  There in lies my issue, I self evaluate myself continually looking for someone to show me or tell me that I am of worth... 

Mainly I have done this, looked to others to validate my worthiness because I felt that it was others that took it away from me to begin with... Just because Ruth my ex step mother did everything she could within her power to destroy my worth, doesn't mean she was right about me.  What it means is that she herself lacked any self worth of her own and instead of making herself a better person, she did everything she could to drag me to her level.

Unfortunately some people never see their worth and what they really could be capable of, they continue to lay the blame from their past experiences in the present.  I can say this because I was raised by her and I did not raise my children the same way... I'm not a perfect mother... who is... but I do know that destroying a child's self worth in themselves will do absolutely nothing to make me feel better.  In fact it would only lower my self worth.

I am not saying that it is easy to overcome how we were raised , on the contrary... I think it is hard work.   However; I think it is work that is worth doing, otherwise she and people like her succeed in pulling me down to their level.   My self worth doesn't come from what Ruth tried to instill in me, nor does it come from anyone else... It comes from me. When I remember that, I know that I have to do something to change my circumstances if I want my feelings to change.

Remember that challenge I said I would have to deal with... it is fast approaching... I have tried to side step it, ignore it and just plain defy it... It's not going away, it's one of those challenges that I am going to have to do something about ... I also know that until I do acknowledge it, it will control me and my emotions.  Some decisions are hard to accept, others are beyond what I think I am capable of  handling.  This quote reminded me that I alone make the decision of my self worth and the way that I deal with this up coming challenge will really show me what I am made of.

I cherish my past, I accept my present and I dream for my future ♥