I Am Doing This For Me, No One But Me!!

Today was a slow day... it took me until 5:00 pm to get myself out of the house... so glad I finally did though, I made myself go out for a really good long walk.  I took Valentina to a big playground... the weather was alternately warm and then cold breezes.  The sky kept looking like it was going to open up and poor out showers... Luckily the weather held off while we took our walk.

Everyday that goes by that I listen to myself about eating properly and getting out to exercise I am grateful.  Unfortunately because I have failed in this in the past.... I have many people reminding me of that.  This is what I have to say to them, yes I have been on this path to lose weight before and I've failed... but there is something different about this time... and I can't explain it completely, I just feel it.

First I am tracking my food... I haven't done this since Weight Watchers years ago.  Second I am exercising daily; I haven't done this since I was a teenager.  Third, I honestly don't think I've ever wanted this so much... for so many reasons. Before I wanted to lose the weight to look better, that is the least of the reasons that I am doing it this time.

 

I am doing this with and for my Valentina, I want her to see a different way to live... a healthy way.  I don't want food to rule her life like I let it rule mine for so many years (food is NOT the enemy).  Also, as I stated before I cannot take cholesterol medication (due to the horrible side effects that caused weakness in my legs, which then caused me to injure my knee)... eating healthy and exercising is the only way I can get control of of my health issues...

It feels as if there are some people who expect me to fail.. I'm here to say that is the girl from the past... I'm not going to fail, I am doing this all for the right reasons. About two weeks ago I had prayed for a way to get on track and the answer came in the form of this contest from work.  The game was just the catalyst to set me in the right direction.

I don't care how rainy, cold or hot it gets... I am including exercise in my life.  I like the way it makes me feel, it's helping me to feel strong. I have never honestly put the two together before, it was always one or the other.  The two of them walk hand in hand for there to be success for me.  I am also surrounding myself with people who believe in me, people who are going to root me on and challenge me in good ways. 

I totally understand when someone is worried that I might be doing too much, not eating enough... no one needs to worry, I am very honest with my doctor, I have known her since I was twenty-five years old.   I tell her everything, she knows all about my crazy life... I think I am following a good healthy diet and there is absolutely nothing wrong with walking a lot.  I walk three or four miles per day but not all at once.  Eventually I want to walk for longer periods but I know that takes some time to build up to...

Truthfully, I have to ignore the people that are not on my side and just surround myself with people who believe in me... there will always be  people who want to see others fail for reasons I will never understand.  Maybe because they fear that success is possible and that if it is proven to them, it means they might have to do something about their own lives....  Either way, I am doing this for me... no one but me.

I cherish my past, I accept my present and I dream for my future ♥