Sometimes All We Need Is To Listen

My head is all over the place, I can't seem to focus my mind... I have been writing one post after the other today, just to delete them.  I was going to write last night but I decided to read all the blogs I follow first, than I fell asleep, exhausted from all the emotional changes that are happening in my life.  I know that some of them are good but it is still hard to not be emotional about them. I know the move will end up being good once I can secure another apartment, it is just the limbo that is scary there.

Other changes that are happening are not as easy to deal with....  I can guess how people are going to react since some people have already reacted and I just don't want to hear what they have to say... I don't want to hear it will get easier with time, it's for the best, it's the right thing...  It's none of these for me... it's hard, it's emotional....It makes me cry... 

I have already heard, it could be worse...  and they bring up some awful story of someone dealing with some horrible challenge.  I know that, I know that it could be worse... I have dealt with a lot of difficult challenges from dealing with being burned in a fire as a child to being physically and emotionally abused as a child, to being in an abusive marriage... than being raped by him.  So I know what a difficult challenge is... I almost feel like they don't think I have the right to be sad about this... I see them shaking their head and saying oh LuLu (my nick name) so and so is dealing with this or that.

I want everyone to stop and understand one thing... we are all dealing with one difficult challenge after another, the last thing we should be doing is saying to someone that what they feel is silly and unimportant... it's important to that person.  I really believe that when we tell people that their feelings don't matter that this can damage the person, where they end up internalizing their feelings instead of expressing them.  We need to release the pain and there should be a safe non judgmental place to do this.

I become so frustrated when I say how I feel and someone wants to tell me how lucky I am that this all I have to deal with... really???  That saying about how we should never seek to judge another person unless we have walked in their shoes comes to mind.  I have almost come to the point that I won't say how I feel to certain people, I will just lie and say it's great, that is all they want to hear...

I personally want to hear the truth, even if I may not think it is important, I empathize, I let people feel and say what they need to... I don't stop them and say... that's all?  This doesn't make me a better person or more in tune... it just means I am willing to hear someone out and try to understand even if I don't completely understand myself...

I cherish my past, I accept my present and I dream for my future ♥