Letting Go To Have The Life Waiting For Me

I know that many, if not all of you have heard the above quote at one time, in one form or another.  Today I heard this quote and it jolted me... I immediately went to the computer and pulled it up... The quotes and life lessons from Joseph Campbell are incredible and thought provoking.

One of the reasons I have had trouble moving on from 'him' was one, I love him with my whole heart and two, I feared what was out there for me.  I remember a woman in her 40's over twenty years ago that I knew who desperately wanted to be married. She finally met and married a man; however he looked like he was old enough to be her father.

I thought to myself at the time, wow... I don't want to get to my 40's being single and settling for a man who looked old enough to be my father... Then I heard that quote this morning and I was reminded that we all have a path we need to be on... That was her path and she was happy with her choice.

My path will lead to my hearts desires and it won't be some old guy who has no desire to live a little... I'm the girl that needs excitement and fun.  Also, just because I have let go of my past, it doesn't mean that it was wrong, it doesn't mean that it wasn't meant to be.  What it means is that I have to trust that some amazing man is looking out there... looking for someone as amazing as me.

If I don't know that I am amazing, how will any man know that.... my self esteem does not depend upon whether a man loves me or thinks I am amazing...  My self worth comes from within.... I do get a little defeated when I keep meeting men that have qualities that are so far removed from what I am desiring... but as my sister said to me this morning.. move on and say 'next'... and never settle.

I will never say it is easy moving on from a dream that you want and that you know would be wonderful... but I also know that not moving on is not an option for me.  If a man cannot see how wonderful and worthy I am, then it is his loss... truthfully it is his loss even more than mine.  I don't want to, nor will I settle for someone who would settle for so little in their life.

I don't believe in fairy tales  but I do believe in love... and deep down inside me that belief has held me together for the past eight months when all I wanted to do was curl up in a ball and cry non stop.  It was and is a rough road, however; I know I will rise above all of this one day and look back... I might even wonder why I almost settled for so much less then I deserved.

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